Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Politically incorrect-Age limit for drinking in India

So now you will have to wait till you are 25 years old to have your first taste of alcohol in India. In a time and age when children are getting matured earlier than we used to in our time, this is whimsical and ridiculous to say the least. A thirteen year old child today knows much more about everything (right from internet to sex) then what we knew at the age of eighteen. It appears that the state wants to find various ways and means for the regulators of this law to line their pockets, for the simple reason, it is impossible to implement this law. And if the powers that be think that they can, they are living in a fool’s paradise. Anyway, I am past sixties, so there.

What next, scam? You are lucky there. There is no age limit here. You scam as early as you can, in fact, sooner the better. Your eligibility to enter politics increases with each scam. Of course, if you are unlucky, you may be tried for these scams once in a while, like say, Kalmadi and Raja. But your ill gotten wealth will remain with you and your chances in political career will increase depending on how thick skin and stubborn you are. Sharad Pawar is a good example.

And then next, sex? The state may come with a law that you can’t enjoy sex till you are 25. You may well ask why. Population control. This is the easiest and surest way of delaying grand arrival of little angles on this fani duniya (retched earth). Of course you can get married at 21 or 18 as the case may be, no denying that. You may romance for the first four years of married life but you can’t have the bliss of consummating your marriage for which you have eagerly waited for 21 years of your life. Of course, you can go on your honeymoon. But the most you can do is to hold hands of your spouse or give him or her, a smooch now and then. That’s it. For the rest of the marital bliss you will have to depend on your imagination for four years. There is a couplet in Urdu which translates: after all there is more thrill in expectation then actual meeting. “Jo maaza intezaar mein hai, vo maaza vasle-yaar mein nahin.”

So be grateful. The state wants to give you more then you share of expectations.

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Header image credit: adapted from David Niblack

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