Thursday, September 10, 2009

Politically incorrect-P.M. Advani

Since Sri L. K. Advani was a Prime ministerial candidate, it would be interesting to anticipate how the man who declared Jinnah, a secular, (Jinnah was a nationalist), would have behaved as our top national leader. I have always found Advani inconsistent. He will give one statement this moment and deny it the next, saying he didn’t mean it.

On his next visit to Pakistan as our Prime Minister, he would have declared Musharraf as our only well wisher and Pakistan to be the only friendly neighbour India could have wished to have. Presently, He would have offered 10 percent commission to Zardari on all our government deals as a gesture of goodwill.

On to Bangladesh – He would have invited Bangladeshi refugees to India assuring them of residences, ration cards and voter’s rights, never mind our own overflowing population living in slums and shitting on streets. That would have ensured increased vote bank for him and would have earned that country’s gratitude.

China – Advani would have guaranteed import of all Chinese third grade products to India irrespective of their health hazards and expiry dates. To further strengthen our friendship, he would have gifted a few thousand square miles of our land to China to be used as burial ground for their bulging population.

Over to US – He would have declared Bush as our benefactor and would have accepted him as our guardian Godfather as Fontane had accepted Brando in Godfather.

In India, he would have ordered all government cars to be converted into chariots. Further he would have compared Narendra Modi with Mahatma Gandhi and declared Modi as father of Gujarat.

A man who could proclaim Jinnah a secular would be capable of these and many more things.

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Header image credit: adapted from David Niblack

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